What do you believe about yourself to be true? Do you realise these beliefs are the filter or screen through which you are living your life? One of the best ways of finding our beliefs is to state an affirmation in the positive. Do you hear any objections in your mind? If you do, these are your true beliefs. Once you have identified these beliefs, you can tap on them to dissolve them. You will then stop attracting things that match up with these same 'negative' or false beliefs.
Gary Craig's (founder of EFT) personal peace procedure is very useful. You make a list of all events that bother you right now when you think about them, write them down, and start tapping on them.
My favourite addition to this list is to also write down the beliefs or conclusions you came to about yourself, others and life as a result of these events. Using EFT to clear the effect of the event itself, only partially resolves the charge in my experience. It is very useful to dissolve the false or 'negative' belief that you arrived at because of what happened, that's when miracles and real emotional freedom begin to unfold. These beliefs are often subconscious but we can shine the light on them by listening to ourselves and looking at what shows up in our life as 'evidence' of those beliefs.
It's amazing how children can internalise happenings/events into beliefs such as:
I am wrong
I am unlovable
I am horrible/disgusting
I don't count
I am not heard
and so on ...
Try and match up all of your events with a belief that you hold about yourself, maybe you will start to see a pattern and then you can tap on it! Our lives and relationships mirror back to us the beliefs, true and false, that we hold about ourselves. If we believe we are bad and attract abuse it is not because we deserve it (although this may be another false belief) it is because the mirror wants us to HEAL our sense of self and remember that we are loved, lovable and accepted.